related inventions:

The Brow Brush

Flannigan's Follicle Restorer

In early 1865, the eccentric English peer, Lord Nigel Twytswerth searched out Michael Flannigan, who was living in Ennis, Co. Clare at the time. Twytswerth was something of an inventor himself, but he had difficulty turning his ideas into working models, and he hoped to enlist the help of Flannigan, who was somewhat (in)famous in England for such devices as the Particulate Breathing Apparatus and the Lady's Aerophagia Ameliorator (Lady Twytswerth had one for each day of the week).

Early experimental model of the Brain Bowler, circa 1865.

Twytswerth suffered from Bral Paulsey Syndrome (see The Inventor's Conference at MahHalem), and some medical practitioners felt that regular and gentle electric current – applied directly to the head – might alleviate the worst of the symptoms, in which the suffers broke into spontaneous chorus-line dancing. But he also wanted something unobtrusive that he could wear while sitting the House of Lords, if need be. The Brain Bowler was born.

Essentially, it was a custom-made derby hat, with a copper band installed where the usual leather band was placed. At the back of the hat, there was a plug where a large copper wire could be attached. The wire, in turn, was connected to a small dynamo that could be cranked by any number of
servants – or in a pinch, by a Member of Parliament.

After a series of treatments with the Brain Bowler, Lord Nigel began to exhibiting all the classic symptoms of Twytism.

Twytswerth insisted on trying the prototype himself, and the first test was a roaring success. The electric charge delivered to his brain nearly killed him, but it completely drove the Bral Paulsey from his system. Unfortunately, Twytswerth did not end the session there, and the highly conductive properties of the copper band in the hat delivered enough current to fell most English gentlemen. Twytswerth was no ordinary lord, however, and his tiny brain could withstand a great deal of electric stimulation, protected as it was by a thick bone carapace.

Flannigan insisted that he replace the copper band with a slightly less conductive composite of steel and zinc, but the damage had already been done. Twytswerth was unable to stop touching his head. Nor could he form a complete sentence, or any vocal communication except for the occasional outburst of laughter, and the words, "oh, I say!"

This syndrome became known as Twytism, but still, Lord Nigel was pleased with the results, as it was much less embarrassing than breaking into spontaneous dance. In fact, while he was in session at the House of Lords, his condition was barely noticeable.

With the metal band instead of the copper one, the Brain Bowler was much safer to use; only one in three suffered serious head trauma. Despite this rousing experimental success, Flannigan was never able to sell more than a few Brain Bowlers, though he took to wearing one himself, because he liked the heft of the metal band.

--"Scholarship" by The Squire