Grandfig: Letters from the Apocalypse

Chester sabotages the oscarsChester had been fucked over by the Academy one too many times. First they hadn’t even nominated his brilliant short film, “Meat Puppets” and then they completely overlooked his feature-length avant-garde romantic comedy, “The Fetus Follies”, despite several endorsements from notable Hollywood luminaries such as Fatty Arbuckle and Wily Costello, the Norwegian star of “Confessions of a Vice Baron”. But today he would have his revenge.

The Academy was about to be traumatized as they had made Chester suffer. It was true that every one of the bodybuilders the Academy had hired to portray their precious Oscar on the awards night had stuffed their gold lame swimming trunks, but that was not Chester’s plan. He had left gelatin capsules in their shorts. By now, the Oscars’ body heat should have melted the containers to sufficiently weaken them, allowing the burrowing ticks (species name: ixodes hollywoodicus) to escape.

It would be a kick line for the ages.

From the Toulouse Le Grandfig Collection.

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